Down by the Cypress Trees

As I finally get the opportunity to relax for a few days and reflect on how crazy this past calendar year has been, there were some challenging memories that came to mind. But in the midst of what was truly a life changing year for me, I have so much to be grateful for.

It was actually close to a year ago today that I had hit one of the lowest points in my life. I had in recent months lost two grandparents who meant the absolute world to me throughout my life, I’d been recovering from a failed relationship and a difficult severance of what was once a close bond, and–in a desperate plea for some relief from people who could not help me–I had begun to push away friends. I felt like I had nobody, completely alone. I drove myself to a hospital to work on my mental health for awhile and spent a few days there. When I emerged, I decided to take about a month off of work to focus on getting back on track.

I returned to my job in January 2023, and honestly, my life has been on an steadily upward trajectory ever since. After I got the help that I needed from professionals, my friends finally did come around and they have always wholeheartedly supported me–some of us remain close to this day.

In May, I lost my cousin, who I considered one of my best friends. He was only 33 years old, and it turned my world upside down. The grief was heavy and it lasted awhile, but my family came together for me, knowing how close we were. Shortly after his death, I met a wonderful group of friends in some of the Young Democrats I now help lead as VP of Nature Coast Young Democrats. I cannot say enough about how encouraging they have been to me, how kindly they have treated me, and how much they lifted me up from a really bad place. And because of them, I found my voice and I have started fighting for what I believe in and fighting for my community–the disabled community.

They, along with the Hernando Democrats, are wonderful, and on this Thanksgiving, they are some of the people I am most grateful for this year. There is one of them in particular who has been a big catalyst to some of my proudest moments of growth this year and I am forever grateful.

As I’ve said every year for the past seven years, I am also grateful to my superiors at my job. They’ve had so much patience and compassion for me throughout the years as I’ve struggled to get my mental health on track. I also cannot say enough about my supervisor, who has been one of the best mentors I have ever had. His encouragement to write is one of the reasons I decided to start this blog.

My family really has stepped up for me this year in the face of all these mental health challenges — encouraging me to stay on top of my medications, take care of myself properly, and keep doing the things I know work for me in a positive way. They’ve shown so much strength throughout my life, and they never let up in their love for me.

Remember that difficult breakup I mentioned earlier? One of my happiest moments this year, and one of the things I am most grateful for is reconnecting with her. Before we dated, we were the best of friends. We both were at difficult points in our lives in 2022 when we tried to date, and it just was the right person, wrong time. She’s back in my life again after we both realized the mistakes we made in the process of severing our relationship, and things are better than ever. I love her to death and she is also a big source of encouragement for me in my writing. She inspires me to live my life to the fullest every single day and to always work hard for what I want, and to never settle. I truly cannot wait to see what the future brings for us.

I am grateful to you all for being on this journey with me, for allowing me a space to be vulnerable and being receptive to it. It was my goal to change lives with this project, and I hope by just being myself to you all, I am doing that.

I know I probably missed a lot of people and things to be grateful for. Through the darkness and the cloudy days, the sun continues to shine and I continue to choose gratitude. Be well this American Thanksgiving.